When I’m hurt, my typical initial reaction would be to call a friend avoid people. I would even leave my habitat and start over, meeting new people until I’m hurt again. There is a reason for this, at least. There is something about pain that makes you crave it. You see, for me, like love, pain is a life gift. You get hurt, you want to feel the pain, to celebrate it. Sometimes you do it by hurting yourself. But, unlike love, pain is not a limited substance – it grows. Sometimes it’s not enough to hurt yourself, you hurt others because you cannot contain the over-growing pain within yourself. I seemed to understand this mechanism hence I kept running away. Continue reading →